Stay in the room

Patti as a 16 year old I recently got an email from a high school student doing research about being a writer. She wondered if I would answer a few questions about the profession of writing for her class project. I said I would, stifling my initial reaction of "you should really ask a writer," in order to help. I love doing email interviews because they force me to address things I never talk about and because I am usually surprised by my answers.

If you could go back to high school, what do you wish you could have known about this occupation?


I think artists and writers – those with a creative spark – get a lot of messages in high school and college about how important it is to have a "real job," to develop a skill or knowledge set that will help them make money in the world. In such a way, the artistic and creative process is relegated to the realm of "hobby" or "when you're not working in your 'real job'". I wish I had known that being an artist or writer is big work in the world, that writers help all of us see the human condition in vital ways, and that just because the worth of their work in the world isn't often measured in dollars, its importance is without measure.

What advice do you have for high school students looking into this occupation?

Write every single day. Don't let a day go by that you don't write at least for 10 minutes. Writing is an art that is honed by sitting in a chair and writing. Writer Ron Carlson says that writers are people who stay in the room – even when the outside world calls you away to keep you from the agony of not knowing what to write, writers are those people who sit back down and stay in the room.

When you're not writing, read. Read everything you can get your hands on. Read in genres you don't necessarily even like – read essays and science fiction and novels and memoirs – read to explore how language creates an entire world with words.

Create a community of people around you with whom you can share and workshop your work. I was in my 40s before I realized the value of being around other writers, having them read my work and comment on it, and reading theirs and providing commentary. It's important, this exposure to how others use language.

Write because you long to say something, not because you want to be published.

What do you like best about this occupation?

I am a lifelong avid reader. I have always loved words. But until I was 45, it never occurred to me that I could be a writer. I still write "on the side," as an adjunct to my "real work." I haven't mastered the dance between those two things.

Story is a yearning meeting an obstacle. Writing requires us to identify very clearly both the deepest yearning (not the one on the surface, but the one way below) and the obstacles, and the dance between them. I love that.

What do I love about being a writer? I love the challenge of capturing a moment in words, of distilling a story into its most important and meaningful parts, of sometimes even capturing the deepest human moment on paper. It is a reflective, observational art that my introverted self loves.

What is the most challenging part of your job?

Reframing the value of what I do when I write. What I am doing now is the most deeply important work I've ever done, and yet I've never been poorer. Putting words into the world because you yearn to say them doesn't mean that you will be rewarded financially for it. It's one thing to rant and rave against a materialistic culture in which that is true – and it is another to realize that one's own beliefs about starving artists and writers is actually contributing to the problem. It is one thing to write what you yearn to say, what you must say, and it is another to begin to pay attention to what will sell. I find myself in conversation with publishers and others about the next project–what will sell–and I have to step back to own and sit with my deepest intention in this work. That's the through-line I must follow, not sales. Saying what is significant may or may not be financially rewarding and artists and writers must stay true to that primary intention in a marketplace that often doesn't reward it. That's tough work, sometimes.

[photo is me at 16, packing to go to Sri Lanka]

About Patti Digh

Patti Digh is an author, speaker, and educator who builds learning communities and gets to the heart of difficult topics. Her work over the last three decades has focused on diversity, inclusion, social justice, and living and working mindfully. She has developed diversity strategies and educational programming for major nonprofit and corporate organizations and has been a featured speaker at many national and international conferences.

9 comments to " Stay in the room "
  • Repeat after me…I AM A WRITER. I AM A WRITER. I AM A WRITER.

  • Julie

    Patti,
    Thanks for responding to this email. I am the student’s teacher and a reader of your blog and so I gave Kara your link because she didn’t know any writers to interview. Seriously, she’ll be thrilled that you responded. Love your writing, by the way.

  • I’m not nearly as far along on the journey as you are, however, I see a lot of parallels and it helps to validate my own love of words and the forward steps I AM taking.

  • Roy

    For what it is worth, I would send the one who wishes to write to Rilke. Go and read Letters to a Young Poet. Temper what you read with an understanding that he was answering this same question as posed to him by another aspiring writer a litle over one hundred years ago. Keep in mind that he was a unique and powerful writer, keep in mind that the only answers to the writer’s question come from within, but listen to what he says.

    Letters to a Young Poet,Ranier Maria Rilke

    “Have patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books written in a foreign language. Do not now look for the answers. They cannot now be given to you because you could not live them. It is a question of experiencing everything. At present you need to live the question. Perhaps you will gradually, without even noticing it, find yourself experiencing the answer, some distant day.”

  • Patti – this is a wonderful post on writing AND how important reading is to a writer. Positive, reassuring, inspiring. Thank you!

  • Delaney – you made me laugh!

    Julie – I’m so glad you connected me to her and I hope my responses were helpful! Tell her to write anytime and I’ll be glad to help! Please see Roy’s comment suggesting Rilke – it would be perfect for Kara to read Letters to a Young Poet.

    Carolynn – enjoy the journey!

    Roy – perfect, perfect, perfect.

    Sunrise Sister – thanks so much!

  • Laure

    patti,

    i am a writer playing hide and seek with myself as a writer. the barrie quote in your right sidebar causes my breath to catch. i have not made any vows about writing but i will say this after visiting with you here this morning … writing can no longer be a flirtation or me!

  • so true, patti. early on, i knew it was a decision between being a writer and saying what i needed to say and doing what i needed to do OR making money. flat out.

    i decided on the prior and never regret it. but now that i’ve turned 50 it doesn’t seem quite as romantic/doable. it’s always a tough balance.

    capturing the imagination is the goal of all writers; capturing attention, anyone can do that, “Dallas” did that.

  • Thanks so much for this post. Lots of nuggets, not just for writers but for anyone intent on expressing their creative self. I’ve always received advice about making writing a hobby, and striving for a ‘real’ job. And sadly, I’ve faithfully followed that advice :-)

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